Monday, September 2, 2013

Bringing To You A Sunday Sound

So as most of you know, I lead worship in Spanish at my church on Sunday afternoons. It was a total surprise to me when I got home after the service, half way into my mango, that my Dad said that he had recorded me singing so that I could hear. He hadn't thought about it, but once he was sitting down he just left his phone recording to later show me. I was really curious so he played it for me while I had dinner. The last time I had heard myself recorded was probably a year ago and honestly God has just been molding my voice one day at a time. It's been a long, beautiful, and painful process that I am so grateful for. For the pain too? Yes. I rejoice for those heart-breaking times because with them has come anointing and passion for the things of God. I guess you could just skip all my ramblings and go straight to hearing the song down below, but I do hope that you'll stick around long enough to hear my little stories. I grew up in a small church where it seemed like if you had any God-given talent you might as well hide it under the table because one must be "humble". I lived with these lies, believed them, and saw life through this lense. Jesus has a way of setting us free from those though, doesn't He? You see I saw two complete polar opposites as I began to serve during worship: those that were reserved and sang quietly as if to stop others from judging them and those who wanted to shine and through their singing they just screamed look at me. Can you guess which one I was? For a long time my voice almost resembled a caged bird, I just wasn't free. I sang almost all the time but something blocked me. My insecurities and the scary thought that people would think that I wanted the attention were a huge part of why I felt stuck. If I got a compliment I had a horrible fear of taking the attention away from God and the first thing I would say was, "thank you, all glory to God." That is still true today but the false humility is broken. I guess I thought that if I'd say it every time, somehow it would be enough to protect me and make God happy. But what does God's Word say again? Oh yeah. 

(1 John 4:18) There is no fear in love. But perfect love drives out fear, because fear has to do with punishment. The one who fears is not made perfect in love.

When God saved me He cleansed a completely prideful girl who thought all she needed was herself to be successful in life, so that girl became so grateful to her God and never wanted to go there again. She thought the best way to thank God was to be the total opposite of who she was. God's voice wasn't all too clear for her yet so she did the best she could with an honest heart knowing that her only truth was the genuine feeling of wholeness she encountered as she closed her eyes and sang. God began to work with that and now this girl knows that true humbleness isn't something one has to try hard to reflect because when your heart is placed in the right place it just flows out. The sound is different and that atmosphere of true worship is created. This is why God became frustrated with the Israelites when He told them how was it that by now they didn't understand that He did not desire sacrifices: it was their hearts He was after. If you've read a lot of my blog posts you'll read a lot about the heart and how it's the beginning of true worship because my journey has been devoted to knowing my Father's heart and that's what He's revealed to me. So I share. Through my spiritual process I've learned what true humility looks and smells like and that lesson is one of the greatest ones yet. It set me free. I say this because I have been wanting to share some of my music but the timing just hasn't been right...I love God's timing though. He loves doing things behind my back to bring about a touching surprise. We do life like that and I wouldn't have it any other way. So I share this "sound" with you as I did on my facebook page with an honestly stripped heart just hoping it makes you smile up at God. I even told my Dad Sunday night, is it weird that I'm here worshiping with myself...so weird lol. It's one thing being up there but stepping down to really hear myself I thought for the first time...I like this person. And again I'm not one to share such super intimate things but I strongly feel to. The process is worth it. Not because of the sound itself but because of the person behind the sound. We are the vessels who can either carry His anointing or just make noise. I live to worship in a way that doesn't make noise but that rather, brings my intimate worship into a public setting. I hope anyone who hears my music can hear and feel that. My life's calling in the worship area is to show people that it's more than okay to draw near, to come as we are, to flow in the Spirit...

This song is called "Te Doy Gloria" and in English it's "I Give You Glory."




Translation:

Oh, how beautiful
Are You, Lord
It's Your words
It's Your love

Oh, how glorious
Are You, Lord
It's Your power
It was Your cross

That saved me
And rescued me
Just a moment there
Set me free

//I give You glory, glory
I give You glory, glory
I give You glory, glory
Jesus//

////With a crown of thorns

You became my King forever///


No comments :

Post a Comment

I would love to hear what you have to say. Share your thoughts. You're so more than welcome to do so. God bless!

Related Posts Plugin for WordPress, Blogger...